Chemo Update and Talents

As I lay (absolutely not sleeping) last night, I thought I should make a sign to hang down from the office doorway that said "Beware the tired and irritable chemo woman within this room.  Enter at your own risk."  Then Tom would have a warning for my mood for today.  Unfortunately, he got out of bed when I did so I just warned him verbally.  8-)

The AC Chemos and steroids do a lot more 'body bloating' than Taxotere.  I was up 5 lbs on the scales this morning and I feel like the goodyear blimp.  My face has the steroid round to it.  Ugh.  Well, all this will pass...the good news is that I haven't thrown up once.  I haven't even felt nauseous so the anti-emetic medicine is working just fine.  Extremely tired would be the basic feeling for the day...lead weights all over my body making moving undesirable.  Other than doing laundry, making beds and cooking lunch and supper, I don't plan on moving around a whole lot.

So, Carol, here's something for hot flashes and blood pressure.  (Other readers, feel free to skip this boring paragraph)  Last week I checked my BP without hot flashes and it would run around 97/69.  I would have a hot flash and the systolic (top) number would rise to 139 but the diastolic (bottom) remained in the high 60's and low seventies.  Not sure if yours are just systolic jumps or both systolic and diastolic rises.  There would be a very slight increase in pulse rate.  I have been having hot flashes every hour since I started this new chemo (hence the lack of sleep last night) and was doing BP checks during that. While not flashing, it is my normal 97/69 but during a hot flash, my BP is dropping really low (89/50 range) but my pulse is racing like crazy (Jumping up to the 80s).  From what I read of the anti-emetic, it causes a lower BP and dizziness.  That may be the reason it is dropping.    Who knows since they dumped so many different medicines (aka poisons) in me yesterday.

Max Lucado's inspirational message for today says:

"Concerning Talents

By Max Lucado

You made me and formed me with your hands.  Give me understanding so I can learn your commands.  Psalm 119:73

God has gifted you with talents.  He has done the same to your neighbor.  If you concern yourself with your neighbor’s talents, you will neglect yours.  But if you concern yourself with yours, you could inspire both."

I've never felt I had any real talent.  I've always seen myself as a medium person.  I can do just about anything set in front of me but I don't particularly stand out as having talent for it.  I had to work hard in college to get all A's.  But there was no talent to that learning.  No gift there.  At work, I have been recognized as a scheduling Subject Matter Expert (SME) and am the only one of my kind in the Huntsville Boeing Facility but I have to work hard to stay on top of all the changes in the scheduling arena.  Usually, people send me an email question and I have to research to see what the latest ruling on it is.  Something that they could have done themselves, but I am there to utilize, so they do.  It's easier for them to do this because I can give them the answer in a nutshell after I've deciphered it.  Anyway, the medium thing goes for any facet of my life but I'm ok with being medium.  I have never seen being medium as having talents so I guess I'm still looking for the 'talents' that God has given me.  8-) I'm sure they are there if He promised them.  8-)  I just need to stop and listen for a while...