Monday, March 10, 2014

I'm just sayin'...

I haven't visited here since September of last year and I don't really know why. 

Life is still fact, it is rushing by like a raging river faster than I can catch the current.  Fall turned into winter which is just about to leap into spring again.  I watch Shadow growing old (she's almost 12 now and kind of lumbers around like she hurts when she walks and I want to tell her that I understand how she feels but somehow we tell these things to each other without words) and I look in the mirror and see the same thing in myself and it's OK.  I'm OK with all that.  Other people fight it.  I don't...after fighting cancer, I wear my lines of age gratefully.  (no, that word wasn't gratefully)  Ever thankful that God has given me more time with my family.

I guess I'm visiting this page because tomorrow is another of those mammogram visits and, no matter how many times I go there, they are terrifying to me.  I know it's been 3 and a half years since the previous diagnosis but it doesn't stop the fear of having to go through all that over again.  I mean, just imagine if every time you walked down a certain road, there was a bully ready to beat up on you, would you really want to walk down that road again?  I'm thinking not.  Mammograms are just big bullies to me. 

I'm just sayin'...

By Grace Alone -